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Recently I have discovered that the word “networking” has been used in many different terms, especially with social media in relation to direct sales, or any other online business. According to Webster’s dictionary, “Networking is the informal sharing of information and services among individuals or groups linked by a common int
erest.”
What exactly is that “common interest”? When using social media and someone becomes a “friend” or “follower”, how do you feel when the first thing that you get is a pitch to “buy my stuff”? Personally, I find it a bit insulting, but given the benefit of the doubt, I have to assume that some just need some training on this tactic. Whether you are networking online or face to face, the message is the same to be effective: build relationships.
Have you ever attended a networking event where you were bombarded with people who just wanted to shake your hand and give you their business card, sometimes without even looking you in the eye? What kind of message does that send you? I have always been taught to pretend that everyone has an invisible sign around his or her neck that says “make me feel important”. That is the first step to beginning any relationship.
Why not start out by asking questions about the other person? Even a shy person likes to talk about him or herself. In doing that, you will often discover some hidden treasures, like a common interest, school, hobby, even television show. That is what starts to make connections. Have a conversation with that person, even a brief one about what it is that you found that you had in common. In person, I always do this BEFORE handing out my card.
This same concept can also be used with social media. For example, on Twitter, you may see a conversation that interests you about your favorite show, hobby, children. When you start by adding to that conversation before you start to follow that person, often they have started following you first. Other social media sites have groups for all kinds of interests. Contribute to the conversation there first, and the connection will be more meaningful.
I belong to a local chapter of BNI International and hold the position of Educational coordinator. One of the reasons that this particular group is effective in growing businesses is the fact that it focuses on building relationships and educating the members on how to find business for one another. Their philosophy is Givers Gain. That is what sets apart someone who is a good networker from a great networker!
Some quick tips on networking:
- Start by learning about the other person. Talk to them, asking questions about their business. (don’t worry, they usually ask you too!)
- If your time is limited for the conversation and you really connect, ask permission to continue the conversation elsewhere. (phone, email, skype, chat, whatever works)
- Find out who their ideal client would be. You may know someone in that situation already that you can recommend. I LOVE initiating a relationship by giving!
- Always ask permission to send emails, whether you met face to face, or online.
- Genuinely care about the person, and what is going on in their life. If you hear that it’s their birthday, or a new baby, show some small kind gesture acknowledging that.
- It’s not about quantity but quality of relationships. I have boxes of business cards that have been given to me that were of no use to me.
- Remember that your integrity is on the line when you refer someone, so get to know the person well enough to make sure that it doesn’t come back to you in a bad way.
March 20th, 2009 at 5:13 pm
Great post. Thank you! Your points about giving and building a relationship first should never be underestimated (and unfortunately is). Thanks for being a great role model and spokeswoman for this wonderful industry.
March 20th, 2009 at 5:27 pm
Thanks so much! I'm glad that you found value in my message today! Once you understand how to network, it's really fun and beneficial to you no matter what business you are in!