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Thanks to Phyllis Zimbler Miller for this guest post today. (Phyllis was one of the collaborators with me in Operation Soldier Care this past summer.) I really feel that this post is valuable in Direct Sales Mentoring!
The concept of direct sales is based on a personal relationship. Does the person to whom you’re selling know, like and trust you?
Yet, have you ever had the experience of trying to talk to a long-time customer and you realize you no longer have that customer’s attention? It’s as if an iron wall has clanged down between the two of you.
Particularly in the rapid-paced world in which we live – when people no longer sit on each other’s porches “chewing the fat,” it is very easy to unintentionally say or do something that can hurt someone’s feelings. For example, a simple remark such as “I haven’t seen you look this good in months,” while meant as a compliment, could easily be mistaken to mean that you usually look like a mess.
Jews have the opportunity once a year to make amends – atonement – for these unintended (or intended) offenses. We don’t do this in synagogue on Yom Kippur – the Day of Atonement; that time is for praying for forgiveness from God.
Instead, in preparation for Yom Kippur we have to personally ask forgiveness from the people in our lives whom in the last year we may have offended. (See my public request for forgiveness )
Whether you’re Jewish, this concept of asking forgiveness is an opportunity that can help you in direct sales. If you don’t want to do this at the time of the Jewish New Year, choose your own annual time to undertake asking forgiveness. Maybe the secular new year is a good time for you – instead of concentrating on making new resolutions, you can focus on mending broken bridges.
Here’s how you can take this opportunity to ensure that you and your customers are on the same page with no unknown offenses responsible for an iron wall:
Image I’m calling on Stacey, who has been a good customer for three years but suddenly she appears distant.
“Stacey, I’ve been working on my communication skills. And I’ve noticed that sometimes, with people who I’ve known for several years, I use a kind of shorthand in talking to them. I don’t always clearly state what I mean. And recently I’ve begun to wonder if some of these people are getting the wrong message from me. Whether perhaps I’ve said or done something that could be misinterpreted as impolite or hurtful. Have I said or done anything to you that might fall into this category?”
Now in most cases the person probably won’t tell you if she has taken something the wrong way. If she does tell you, that’s an added bonus because you can directly address that perceived wrong. But if she doesn’t say anything, or says no you haven’t (but she’s probably not telling the truth), here’s what you go on to say:
“Just in case I have, please forgive me. I promise to try harder in the coming year to ensure that what I say or do can’t be misinterpreted. You’re a valuable customer, and I wouldn’t want to lose your friendship over a misunderstanding.”
Bingo! In most cases being this honest should help strengthen or repair the relationship you’ve had with this person. And the more you say this (to each customer), the more you’ll take it to heart yourself.
Then you truly will be on the way to putting yourself in the other person’s shoes when you speak or act. And thus you’ll be able to reduce the times you unintentionally hurt someone’s feelings.
And if you’re not perfect in the coming year (and who can be), there’s always next year to again ask for forgiveness.
Phyllis Zimbler Miller MILLER MOSAIC, LLC — Working to Make Your Life Easier www.millermosaic.com
Related Reading:
Latex and Lingerie: Shopping for Pleasure at Ann Summers Parties (Materializing Culture)
More Build It Big: 101 Insider Secrets from Top Direct Selling Experts
Build It Big: 101 Insider Secrets from Top Direct Selling Experts
Marketing to Women: How to Understand, Reach, and Increase Your Share of the Largest Market Segment
